Who in the Bible would you say had the best marriage? Adam and Eve started in Paradise, and it all went downhill from there. Abraham lied and said his wife, Sarah, was his sister, then impregnated her servant, Hagar. Isaac and Rebekah spent much of their marriage battling because he favored Esau and she favored Jacob. Jacob had children by two different wives, and the wives’ servants.
All we know of Moses’ wife is they had an argument over circumcising their son and she called Moses a “bridegroom of blood” (Ex 4:26 NIV). David was a disaster as a husband, and Solomon was worse. When Job’s life got hard, his wife told him, “Curse God and die!” (Job 2:9 NIV). In fairy tales, life is a difficult adventure until you get married—then you live happily ever after. But nowhere in the Bible does a couple get married and then live happily ever after.
Marriage doesn’t save anyone, only Jesus does. Yet how often in churches do couples sit in silent agony? They have an image of spiritual success to project, but they don’t enjoy intimacy. Or there is abuse going on. Or their young daughter is pregnant, and they have no idea what to do. Or one of them is a closet alcoholic. Or they’re facing bankruptcy. Frequently people who need help the most receive it the least, because they would have to step down from their pedestal.
But what if real people could be as truthful as the Bible about marriage? In Scripture, marriage is a place where we learn, receive God’s grace, and grow together in love.